


Sides on Sides

by jamjoon



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Canon Compliant, Fluff and Smut, M/M, Soft af
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-03-23
Updated: 2017-03-23
Packaged: 2018-10-09 18:30:29
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,709
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10418454
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jamjoon/pseuds/jamjoon
Summary: They're wonderfully unconventional.  Unexpected maybe, but good nonetheless.





	

**Author's Note:**

> this is bad but the mx comeback show made me Feel Things

They say he’s a terrible maknae.

They say he acts like nothing of the sort, but Changkyun never minded the words. None of them act as they should, don't they?

Their big beefy visual cries the most – buys cute clothes and gets lonely too often. Their tiny vocalist is full of fire; their tall sleepy telephone pole can out-dance them any day. A scary rapper? Try a squishy bean that crawls in your bed and hogs all your blankets. The loud one? A beautiful blend of masculine and feminine, disregarding gender roles altogether.

Changkyun was always mesmerized by them. By their sides on sides and their surprising depth behind squeaky clean idol faces. Some not even that squeaky (Wonho). After their rocky No Mercy start, walls melted and apologies happened and Changkyun still learns new things about them every day.

But there’s one that has always been more fascinating than the rest. Captivating, in a way. Changkyun knew he wanted to kiss Hyunwoo the first day he met him. He was fucking pretty, broad and tall and shockingly manly. Changkyun assumed he was a rapper, out of a conditioned habit of basing books off their covers, only to choke on spit the first time he ever heard Hyunwoo sing. Like, how? How does a voice like that come out of a body like _that?_

Well, whatever. Changkyun can’t say much, because he’s the second itty bittiest on the team, and still continues to have the deepest voice, probably. Well. Hyunwoo’s is pretty deep. When he’s not singing. Fuck.

 Anyway, Changkyun has always wanted to kiss Hyunwoo. He’s big and soft and appears to be Tough Robot Shownu with a limited amount of pre-programmed emotions, but once or twice Changkyun has seen him express deeper, more meaningful feelings. Which is always the most meaningful of them all.

He’s unlike any other leader. Other leaders are headstrong and controlling – never afraid of a challenge, never hesitant to take the extra mile.

Hyunwoo isn’t like that. But where he lacks, they fill in. Where he’s soft, Kihyun is strong, and where he’s insensitive, Hoseok is understanding. In return, he’s one of the best leaders they ever could have hoped for. Gentle yet sturdy prodding. Steadfast in his decisions, but willing to listen. Always willing to listen.

_“I might not be able to help,_ ” he’d said, through the bathroom door. _“But I have ears.”_

And Changkyun had sniveled through his palms, the weight of their careers around his neck, and stood to unlock the door. And Changkyun kissed him. Because romantic or not, he loves Hyunwoo. 

Hyunwoo had kissed him back. That’s just the kind of person he is. The only sign of surprise was the slight twitch of his hands, before settling on Changkyun’s shoulders, and letting him cry it out.

He had listened. For a long time. In the moment, Changkyun didn’t have any regrets. He doesn’t have any regrets now.

Especially since he’s buried deep in Hyunwoo’s big barrel chest. He’s got his tanner fingers between his own, running his thumbnail up and down the lines of Hyunwoo’s right palm. His fingers are strong, nails perfectly trimmed. The pudge of his palm looks round and sweet enough to eat. Changkyun brings Hyunwoo’s hand to his lips, and nibbles an experimental bite into the meat of his palm. Hyunwoo makes a breathy noise, more of a laugh.

“What’s with the biting?” Hyunwoo asks. He’s careful to add, “Not that I mind.”

Changkyun licks across the teeth marks, and pulls away. He didn’t bite hard enough to hurt – just to make tiny red indents. He shrugs, head lolling on Hyunwoo’s shoulder, “You’re delicious.”

“Interesting,” Hyunwoo says, and falls silent.

Changkyun doesn’t mind the frequent silences. He can be silent too. Sometimes not. Sometimes he’s talkative. Sometimes Hyunwoo has a lot to say, too. They come and go with the seasons, and it works just fine for Changkyun.

He’s not quite sure what they’re doing. Together, that is. Changkyun kissed him on a sad day. They’ve been kissing ever since. And sharing beds. And fucking in the shower. Shh.

“What do I taste like?” Hyunwoo asks. His voice just as rumbly and raw as Changkyun’s.

Changkyun answers as creepy as he can. “Like human skin.”

Hyunwoo breathes another laugh, “Interesting.”

“Would you ever eat a person?”

“I don’t think so…” Hyunwoo ponders. “I don’t know why I’d want to. Cows still exist.”

“What if they didn’t?” Changkyun squirms and wiggles, and Hyunwoo shifts to accommodate him. A big arm falls around his shoulders, and it makes Changkyun’s stomach tighten with how much he loves it.

“What if cows didn’t exist?”

“Yeah. Would you eat a person then?”

“I don’t….think so. I like chicken too. And fish.”

Changkyun threads their fingers together, “What if we were stranded on an island, and your only option was to eat me.”

“I’d probably just die,” Hyunwoo shrugs. “You can eat me instead. I wouldn’t mind.”

That’s funny enough to shock Changkyun into laughing. He cackles, before settling back into the divot of Hyunwoo’s shoulder. He’s freshly showered, free from the cologne and the makeup and the other nonsense they wear all day. It’s just Hyunwoo in his rawest form, and it’s something Changkyun has come to appreciate. He sighs, “Thanks, but I’d probably just build a boat.”

Hyunwoo laughs, “That works too.”

They fall back into silence. Changkyun would purr if he could. As leader, Hyunwoo gets his own room, but they’ve been sleeping in the same bed for so long they might as well be roommates.

Changkyun loves him. Loves that Hyunwoo humors him. Loves that he’s patient and soft and so so gentle, but still so _strong_ when he wants to be.

Changkyun isn’t sure if there’s supposed to be something deeper here. He isn’t sure if Hyunwoo feels the same way he does. But he’s not about to go upsetting the apple cart, so, as long as Hyunwoo is willing to kiss him behind closed doors, Changkyun won’t complain.

 

* * *

 

“Isn’t it tiring?”

Hyungwon stands tall, shoulder up against the bathroom doorway. He’s sleepy and attractive like always.

“What? Jet lag? Yes.” Changkyun wipes his hands with a towel.

“No. Pretending it all means nothing.”

Changkyun immediately looks in the mirror, to the reflection of their hotel room door. It’s closed.

Changkyun speaks a little quieter, “Is that what we do?”

“Isn’t it?” Hyungwon disappears to pop off his shirt, voice slightly muffled, “You were both so snuggly on the plane.”

“We’re always snuggly. It’s nothing”

“But it means more than nothing. Don’t it.”

Changkyun stares at the sink porcelain, and says nothing.

“Not that I care,” Hyungwon reappears, “but I kinda’ care. What are you afraid of?”

“Breaking it.” Changkyun answers bluntly. It’s terrifying. The idea of breaking this glass house he’s built around them. A home where the societal construct of dating can no longer touch them.

“You won’t.”

“I could.”

“What if he feels the same?”

Changkyun exhales harshly, turning around to lean up against the countertop, and look Hyungwon in the eye. “He doesn’t.”

“And, pray tell, how would you know?”

“You know Shownu.” Changkyun barely tilts his chin, “He likes making us happy.”

Hyungwon snorts, “You think he fucks you over the dining-room table just because it makes you _happy_?”

Changkyun narrows his eyes, “How’d you know ‘bout that?”

“Believe it or not, I smelled the bleach when I sat down for breakfast.”

“Hm.”

“I’m not going to make you do shit,” Hyungwon shrugs, “but I think you’d be happier if you like, I dunno’, talked about your emotions.”

Changkyun scrunches up his nose, and Hyungwon drops the subject with an eyeroll.

Still, Changkyun appreciates his concern. So he climbs into his bed and rubs his cheek against Hyungwon’s until he laughs, and pushes Changkyun to the floor.

 

* * *

 

In a sense, it does get tiring.

It’s an out of body experience. Being exhausted from schedules, on top of the everyday strains of life. It’s ethereal, laying beneath a warm Hyunwoo, and feeling him wander down your throat. He noses beneath Changkyun’s ear. Breathes in. Kisses lazily. Like they’re lovers with all the time in the world.

But they’re not.

It’s a sad realization. An unfortunate one.

Changkyun pulls his hands away from Hyunwoo’s biceps, where he was digging little half moons with his nails. His heart is in his throat when he croaks, “Hyung.”

A deeper hum answers him.

“Can we talk?”

Hyunwoo stops everything. He wiggles up with a single nod, and sits next to Changkyun politely. It’s endearing. Like he wasn’t just grinding against Changkyun’s thigh three seconds ago.

Changkyun sits up too, sinking into the safe corner where the two walls meet. Hyunwoo is looking at him with his full attention, and Changkyun realizes he didn’t rehearse what he was going to say.

He clears his throat, “Uh. I have something to say.”

Hyunwoo nods, “Okay.”

“I, uh.” Changkyun scratches his head. “I don’t…I don’t…”

“Do you want to stop…?” Hyunwoo gestures between them, a wide but understanding look in his eyes. It’s odd – usually it’s Changkyun finishing Hyunwoo’s sentences for him.

“Yes.” Changkyun says, and watches Hyunwoo solemnly nod. “Wait. _No._ Yes and no.”

Hyunwoo stares.

Changkyun’s hands feel cold. He warms them between his knees, and forces his words deep and steady, without stutter.

“I don’t want to keep doing this if you don’t like me back.”

Hey, not so bad.

Hyunwoo’s lips are a firm line, but his eyes are electric and round with surprise.

“Oh,” he blinks. “Well that makes sense.”

“Does it?”

“Yeah.” Hyunwoo rubs behind his head, sheepish and cute. “I guess I- I guess I never _said_ I liked you.” He adds, “-Back. Out loud. Wait. _Back,_ as in-“

“It’s mutual.” Changkyun finishes, but it sounds almost like a question.  

“Yes?” Hyunwoo tips his head. He looks so much like a puppy. His shirt is tugged down low, stretched from Changkyun’s fingers. His lips are still kissed red, hair messy.

Changkyun breaks out laughing, because the weird knife in his gut has turned to butterflies, and there’s too much air in his lungs. He rests his forehead against his knees – he squeezes his eyes shut and just…laughs.

“We’re terrible at this.”

“I don’t know about that,” Shownu tentatively shifts closer. A palm wraps around his ankle. “I don’t think we’re _that_ bad.”

Changkyun opens his eyes, exhaling enough to feel his head clear. A weight lifts from him, something he didn’t even realize he was carrying.

“Are you hungry?”

Now lighter, Changkyun looks up with a crooked smile, “It’s almost one in the morning.”

“We don’t have a schedule until nine,” Hyunwoo slips out of bed, and extends his hand. “Come on.”

Changkyun takes his hand. Takes it all the way to the kitchen. Through the front door. Down the dark streets and into the twenty four hour café.

And they have a date there, still in pajama pants.

 

* * *

 

There’s something about being a maknae that invites everyone to touch you. Headpats, shoulder grabs, hands around waists and cheeks rubbed against yours. Hyungwon is maybe (maybe) the least criminal, but even then, Changkyun will sometimes feel fingers dip into his beltloops, and gangly arms entwine with his own.

Changkyun pretends to hate the manhandling, but some deep part of him really likes it. Like a well praised puppy.

He likes Hyunwoo’s touchiness the most, but that’s a given.

“You’re a jerk,” Hoseok pouts from across the tiny box of a backstage, curled up on the corner of a white leather couch. “A real hypocrite.”

Changkyun swivels on Hyunwoo like a lapdog, nose upturned.  

“You hug too hard,” Changkyun argues. “Learn your strength, you barbarian.”

Hoseok makes an offended noise, and gets a consulting shoulder pat from Jooheon.

“He has good taste,” Kihyun says, without looking up from his iPad.

“What’s that mean?”

“I’m _saying_ that if I was- _had to_ sit on a lap, per say, I’d choose Hyunwoo’s.”

“I was gonna’ say Jooheon,” Minhyuk points, suddenly interested in the conversation. “Lots of sitting room.”

There’s a chorus of agreements, and Hoseok seems to melt more in frustration. Changkyun laughs, but stops when he feels Hyunwoo’s chin on his shoulder.

Jooheon’s little dimples pop once he smiles, and curls further into the couch with pride.

 “And not mine?” Hosoek slaps his leg. “I have great thighs.”

“They’re rock solid,” Changkyun compliments. “But it’s like sitting on concrete.”

“You’ve got such a fat ass,” Hoseok crosses his arms, “concrete should feel like a pillow.”

“A fatter ass than yours.”

“This is the worst day of my life.”

They break out laughing, the façade of (trying to) be mean to Hoseok melting away. Minhyuk scrambles to Hoseok’s side in a giggle, squishing his cheeks between his palms and cooing away his pout.

Changkyun revels in the laugh behind him. It vibrates through him, up his arms and into little goosebumps. Hyunwoo noses back into his neck, and shifts Changkyun’s weight on his lap, before settling for a quick nap before the stage.

Changkyun really doesn’t mind the manhandling. Pretends to mind. But does not.

 

Especially when he’s pushed up against the wall of Hyunwoo’s bedroom. He’s strong enough to support Changkyun’s thighs on his forearms, the wall bearing the rest of the weight. Changkyun doesn’t mind. Not when Hyunwoo noses into his throat. Not when they kiss long and breathy and desperate. Hyunwoo’s lips are perfectly shaped for kissing.

Changkyun can never get enough air. It feels like his soul is hooked through his lungs, pulled and reeled by Hyunwoo’s tongue. His fingers shake against Hyunwoo’s cheeks; if Hyunwoo notices, he doesn’t say a thing.  

Instead he steps backwards, Changkyun squeaking as Hyunwoo supports his full weight, and flops him on the bed. He makes a very unsexy _oof!_ noise, and Hyunwoo giggles atop him. Big hands push and nudge at his knees, until his thighs are parted and Hyunwoo is kneeling sweetly between them. Changkyun pouts. Hyunwoo reaches up with his thumb, and brushes it away.

“Are you tired?” Hyunwoo asks.

“No.” Changkyun hooks a leg around his hip, and pulls and pulls until Hyunwoo is hovering over him. His forearm comes to rest across Changkyun’s chest, and he leans over the side of the bed to dig underneath.

“Do you wanna’ top?” Hyunwoo asks, voice muffled. Changkyun is tempted to say yes, but they have a full schedule tomorrow, and nobody is gonna’ notice a quiet Changkyun sitting in the back. Doni and Coni will however, notice a sore leader Shownu.

“Nah,” Changkyun tugs and pulls until the hem of Hyunwoo’s shirt is within his reach. He digs his fingers underneath, and runs his nails up his spine. Hyunwoo shudders beneath his hands. “I’m feeling needy.”

“Okay,” Hyunwoo nods. He sits up enough to peel Changkyun’s jeans away, inch by inch. Fingers sweep back up from his ankles, to his thighs. His touch swirls with heat, erotically soft, almost making Changkyun squirm.

He’s being softer than usual. Changkyun can tell by the look in his eyes.

“Okay?” Changkyun asks.

“Hm?” Hyunwoo looks up, “Yeah.” He pauses. “Just. You’re pretty.”

Changkyun brings the sleeve of his sweatshirt up to his nose, and shifts his hips to help Hyunwoo pull away his briefs.

“Not necessarily.” Changkyun spreads his naked thighs for Hyunwoo, pulling his arms high above his head. “I’m what they call a- _nn-_ “ Hyunwoo rolls his lubed fingers up the sensitive skin of his high, high inner thigh, and Changkyun finishes, “-a visual hole.”

Hyunwoo’s face contorts into that disappointed pout that nobody likes. He huffs, “You know that’s not true.”

Changkyun wraps his slender fingers around the bars of the headboard, then shrugs, “It’s kind of true.”

He inhales deeply when Hyunwoo rolls one finger in. He’s not even fully hard, but Hyunwoo’s fingers are much larger than his own, and it sends warmth up and down his body. 

“Take it back,” Hyunwoo demands.

“No.”

Hyunwoo crooks his fingers – the tease of a punishment – and his blunt fingertip presses just right. Changkyun chokes a noise, so, _so_ not ready for that yet, so he scrambles to beg, “ _Ahh,_ alright alright, I – hh- I take it back.”

Hyunwoo arches an eyebrow. He straightens his finger, and coaxes another alongside it. He settles forwards enough to press a big round kiss to the flat plane of his navel, and Changkyun’s cock twitches by his chin.  He rumbles, “We don’t have any visual holes.”

And then he slides downwards on the bed, arching enough to scissor his fingers, and suck right beneath the head of Changkyun’s cock – and Changkyun’s back arches with an accidental moan.

Hyunwoo always looks fine as hell, but he is the _finest_ with his lips stretched and pretty. Changkyun gets one single moment of clarity – a single moment to watch Hyunwoo’s eyelashes brush his cheeks, and his eyes narrow in concentration – before those fingers curl and Changkyun nearly breaks the headboard.

“Oh _fuck._ ” Changkyun squirms, a foot lifting to prod against Hyunwoo’s ass. Hyunwoo swallows calmly around him, bobbing at whatever pace he wants, and Changkyun preens, _“Oh,_ oh, oh, shit. Hyung, your fucking m-mouth.”

Hyunwoo presses his tongue flat as a response, and Changkyun’s head flops back into pillows. Hyunwoo works him open, peels him apart, thread by thread, line by line. He squirms, arches, fucks himself on Hyunwoo’s fingers, and feels Hyunwoo’s throat work in tandem. Hyunwoo is so multi-talented.

His gut tightens, thighs already spasming as a sign. So Changkyun pulls on Hyunwoo’s hair begging, _“_ I’m ready, please, fuck, please-“

Hyunwoo doesn’t have to be told twice. In seconds he’s back on his knees, fingers wiping clean on the sheets, before rolling on a condom and spreading Changkyun’s thighs once more.

“Ah, shit, ah fuck,” Changkyun continues a mantra of curses, staring at the ceiling. He’s still close, dick twitching with the loss of contact. He scrambles for the lube, and Hyunwoo takes it to pour a generous amount right atop Changkyun’s cock. It drips down, cold and sensitive, and Changkyun wants to peel out of his skin, he’s so turned on.

“Up,” Hyunwoo prods, so Changkyun lifts his hips. Yes, yes, fuck yes, he’s _so_ excited, so-

Hyunwoo fucks him on his knees, his grip hard on Changkyun’s hips, and Changkyun leaves this plane of existence. It’s everything; pistoning hips, grips on headboards, sweat and kisses and everything, _everything._  

Hyunwoo is so good to him. So good to lean forwards, and brace a hand up against Changkyun’s on the headboard. Good, as he kisses Changkyun with- with an undeniable amount of- of love. Yeah.

Changkyun loves the fucked-out feeling. Loves getting lost in it. Loves feeling his gut tighten like screw, before shaking apart. Hyunwoo is a god above him, a fucking god. 

Changkyun comes silently, but when he does, his hands shakily leave the headboard, and plaster to Hyunwoo’s face. He exhales and exhales, locking eyes with Hyunwoo, fingers sweeping sweat from his temple. Hyunwoo’s pace falters, and Changkyun comes so hard his cock lifts from his navel.

Hyunwoo seems to roll in on himself, head falling in Changkyun’s hands, his hips rolling desperate and chasing. Changkyun can only mumble half- coherent words; his body thrums so warm and safe and spent, but he still finds the energy to run his nails down the lines of Hyunwoo’s throat, and roll his hips to meet Hyunwoo’s last few thrusts.

 

* * *

 

He accidentally leaves a fine line of marks down the side of Hyunwoo’s neck. They’re quite prominent in the morning, red and perfectly linier.

Changkyun seems more upset about it than Hyunwoo is, perched on the countertop with a frown. He watches Hyunwoo shave, line by line, methodical and robotic. The razor grazes right over the fine red lines, but Hyunwoo is skilled enough to leave himself unscathed.

“They can cover it with makeup,” Hyunwoo says sleepily. He turns his head this way and that, before shaving across the left side of his face. Line by line. The scraping sound is loud, compared to the silent chirping of birds outside.

Changkyun still pouts, dangling his legs off the side of the counter. “Still. I’m sorry.”

Hyunwoo washes off the razor, tapping it twice on the edge of the sink. Changkyun reaches into the medicine cabinet.

“You have nothing to apologize for.” Hyunwoo steps between his legs, big hands coming to rest on his knees. Changkyun focuses on unscrewing the jar of aftershave.

Lips come to press against his ear, and Changkyun shivers involuntarily. His arms raise with goosebumps – Hyunwoo’s face is smooth and lightly damp. He douses his fingers in the jar, before nudging Hyunwoo back far enough.

Hyunwoo looks him in the eye with that soft smile of his, and Changkyun’s frown chips away. He rubs the aftershave between his hands, and lifts his fingers to smear it across Hyunwoo's cheeks.

Hyunwoo doesn’t have to close his eyes, but he does anyways. Changkyun is slow. He traces across his upperlip, down his jawline. Beneath his ear. Under his chin. Down, feeling every divot of Hyunwoo’s throat- and there’s the nail marks, agitated by the sharp razor. Changkyun feels across them; Hyunwoo makes a soft, winded noise.

Changkyun loves this. He isn’t too fond of early mornings. But he _looooves_ this.

He rubs the gel in with the pads of his thumbs, massaging down his throat, and back up to his round cheeks. He spreads his fingers, until Hyunwoo’s face is back between his hands.

Changkyun didn’t realize the habit he’d created, until now. This habit of holding Hyunwoo’s face. His cheeks are just – just _hand_ shaped. Perfect for Changkyun’s palms.

He pulls lightly, and presses a kiss across the top of Hyunwoo’s left eye. Hyunwoo jumps slightly, eyes blinking open, and Changkyun offers a smile.

The dorm is alive now, pots and pans and loud talking echoing beyond the bathroom door. Minhyuk’s voice calls from the livingroom.

_“We gotta GOO!”_

Changkyun and Hyunwoo laugh, forehead to forehead, before Hyunwoo picks him up and sets him back on the ground.

“Ready to go?”

“Yep.”

Changkyun looks Hyunwoo up and down, before shoving his hands in his pockets, and saying, “Grab a scarf.”

**Author's Note:**

> Pls stream their Beautiful mv i want my babies to get their first win


End file.
